The Christian and the Massage Parlours
When I was serving my National Service, we would sometimes go for overseas trainings. These trips often ended with a few days of R&R – Rest and Relaxation. I remember one particular evening when a group of my army mates quickly gulped down their dinner and slipped out of the meal room in a rather sheepish manner. Curious, I followed them, wondering what exciting adventure awaited.
It didn’t take long before I realised where they were heading — to a row of poorly lit “massage parlours”, and the atmosphere was heavy with suggestion. Instinctively, I made a quick U-turn and walked away. Later, I found out that these parlours offered more than massages; they offered sexual services, the so-called “happy endings.”
During my reservist days, I saw the same thing happening. It was almost an unspoken norm for some reservist men (married included!) to frequent such places during overseas R&R. It became so common that the army, in an attempt to prevent sexually transmitted diseases, distributed free condoms to its soldiers. It saddened me to see how easily moral boundaries could be blurred under the guise of “relaxation.”
When Relaxation Leads To Destruction
Fast forward to my years in pastoral ministry, I have had to minister to Christian men who fell into fornication or adultery when visiting massage parlours.
Many began innocently. They were introduced by friends who told them how relaxing a massage could be. Their first visit was harmless enough — or so they thought. The masseurs were friendly, chatty, and sometimes flirtatious. Over time, familiarity grew, boundaries softened, and one day, the masseur offered something “extra,” perhaps even for free. That was how some men fell — step by step, touch by touch, until they were trapped in a web of lust, guilt, secrecy and shame.
I know of one who contracted a sexually transmitted disease. Others shipwrecked their marriages. Each story began with a simple desire for physical relief but ended with a trail of painful emotional and relational destruction.
The Rise of Massage Culture
Today, the “massage culture” has become so normalised. Many Singaporeans cross the border for a cheap massage. This trend sometimes extends even to church camps, where participants use their free time to visit massage parlours nearby.
Regrettably, some church youths and young adults are being introduced to this massage culture by older Christians, often unaware of the hidden dangers.
While it’s true that many massage parlours operate professionally, there are also many that offer “extra services” behind closed doors — both in Singapore and just across the causeway.
Massage, by its very nature, can be addictive. It releases endorphins and dopamine — chemicals that make us feel relaxed, comforted, and happy. The danger is that these same sensations can lower our guard, stir up desires, and create emotional attachments that are hard to break.
My Personal Stance
Personally, I have chosen not to go for massages — not even couple massages. I find it too risky. To have another woman touch my body for the purpose of rest and relaxation, even done professionally, feels like crossing a line of intimacy that belongs only to my wife.
Touch is powerful. It conveys care, comfort, and sometimes, unintended affection. A touch that brings relief and pleasure can easily stir up something deeper within the region of fallen emotions. I am not confident that I can stay completely pure in my thoughts in such moments.
So, I made a personal commitment to my wife — that I will not go to any massage parlour, with or without her. It is my way of drawing a clear boundary, not out of fear, but out of reverence for God and respect for my marriage.
Questions to Ask Before You Step In
If you are thinking of visiting a massage parlour, perhaps pause and ask yourself these questions:
-
Can you handle the physical touch without forming emotional attachment to the masseur?
-
Can you receive such touch without entertaining lustful thoughts?
-
Are you ready to reject any unholy proposition if it is offered to you?
-
Do you have an accountability structure — someone who knows and checks in on you?
Have you chosen a reputable and transparent establishment, instead of opting for a cheap and questionable one just to save some money?
Could your visit to a massage parlour cause younger Christians, who may not understand its potential dangers, to stumble in their faith?
The Bible reminds us in 1 Thessalonians 4:3-4:
“It is God’s will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality; that each of you should learn to control your own body in a way that is holy and honourable.”
Our bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit. They are not instruments for pleasure alone, but vessels meant to honour God.
In Closing
There is nothing wrong with wanting rest, relaxation, or relief for tired muscles. But as followers of Christ, we must remain alert to how easily innocent indulgence can open the door to temptation.
Every decision we make with our bodies has spiritual implications. As Jesus said,
“The spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak.” (Matthew 26:41)
So, guard your heart, draw your boundaries, and keep yourself pure — even when everyone else says it’s “no big deal.”